Anglican Incident (Defined)

Since I've used the expression Anglican Incident a few times now, I thought a working definition might be in order:

an·gli·can in·ci·dent

n. a protracted episode involving more than one Anglican and generally characterized by:

• Increased frequency of mitre sightings in international airports
  
• A marked rise in the fog index with off-the-chart use of the words authority, polity, report, and resolution
• The multiplication of straw people and positions to knock down in a temper when reasonable arguments are otherwise unavailable
• Cadres of clergy, bloggers, and theologians prowling for enemies (or straw people) to rail against
  
• A proliferation in the number of canon lawyers
• Anglican documents attaining headline status
  
• An approaching Lambeth Conference
• A larger than usual catch of red fish of the herring species
  
• Renewed scrutiny over the writings of 16th- and 17th- century theologians, at least one of whom, in the minds of the uninitiated, risks getting confused with prostitution
  
• The invocation of the names Spong and Pike often, but not exclusively, in reference to those damned Yanks
• Obsession over the number of votes, parishes, dioceses, bishops, words in speeches by the Archbishop of Canterbury, and angels dancing on the head of a pin
  
• The majority of the laity rolling their eyes and getting on with the business of the Gospel of Jesus Christ
• Clerical frustration at observing the above
  

Additional suggestions for this definition are welcome.